We need to talk about it

With earning my degree, I had to read books and take classes in children in crisis so Mercyhurst giving a book about children in crisis in Benjy's name seems fitting. Some times I wish I could of intervene in Benjy's life more. I understand the pain of the mind and wanting it to go away. I have found therapy helps but is not the only answer. Some times we have to except what we have been handed and learn to deal with it. I have no answers, just more questions but I know reaching out to others and talking about it helps. ( may not be appropriate though) I hope that all who reads this will reach out and talk about it and listen to others.

I have been listening to old songs and thinking about the ones I've loved before. Do you think if they ever think of me( in a good way)? I don't like spending time, thinking, it always gets me into trouble but mowing the lawn is something that is hard to do together and talk.. Taking care of my husband has taken a small toll on my phycee, I start to wonder if anyone could ever care for me that way? To tend to another every need, to feed, clean, dress, ,medicate and then run all their wants too. I love my husband, don't get me wrong and I'm sure he loves me in his way, but could anyone love me to take care of my needs? Oh I asked that before. Well back to those old songs. ( somethings, like reasons, are put in a jar, what ever happened to wishes, wished on a star. Was it just something that I made up for fun)

just tired

"do for me, die for me, lift me, carry me. Finally got a guy to " just like the old song, I do everything for my husband, now a day. Help me up, shower me, I need to go to the bathroom, and so on and so on. I've tried sleeping on the couch so I will hear him in the night. When I did this for others I got paid and got to leave after 12 hours. Oh I'm glad he is home and he is doing so much better here than in the hospital. You could just say I'M TIRED.